I found this picture in an ad I got in the mail from a local grocery store today. Have you ever seen a more cracktastic spread?
Billy: "Hey Mom, what's for dinner?"
Mom: "Pepperoni pizza, orange juice, a basket of whole-wheat bread, some cocktail shrimp and a big bowl of raw hot peppers."
Billy: "Cool, I like pizza. Wait, what? A bowl full of raw..."
Mom: "Yeah! A bowl full of hot peppers. Is there a problem with that? Do I look like Paula-fucking-Dean to you?"
Billy: "Uhhh... DAAAD! I think Mom stopped taking her medication again!"
Mom: "Your father? You're calling him to help? Ha! Oh, you are just like him. So judgemental. Nothing is ever enough. I even spent the whole damn afternoon rolling up lunch meat JUST LIKE YOU LIKE IT Oh, and I threw on some olives. OLIVES, dammit. And DIP! Creamy-orange dip, because MOMMY LOVES YOU."
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